Tag: Mental Health

If You Suffer From Depression Get Help

Yesterday I heard the heartrending story of a father who jumped in front of a moving train while holding his young daughter. He was instantly killed. Miraculously, the child survived and was able to crawl from under the train to good samaritans who took her to safety. The deceased man was said to be a good father, but he suffered from depression.

I cannot judge this man, clearly his thought process was not rational when he jumped. Mental illness is nothing to be ashamed about. In many cases medication can help. Do not keep it to yourself see a professional get help. You might not get a cure but you can get the help you need to live a normal and fulfilling life. Don’t suffer in silence. Get help.

Indifference

The silence between them is profound
She yearns so much
 for a hug from him
 or just a gentle touch.
But he turns away and she feels frozen
 by the coldness he displays.
 Feelings of love unrequited
hits her like a mountain waves.
She would do anything
 if this relationship she could save.

His phone rings, he answers it and smiles,
“I am going to meet Sam for a drink,” he says
But of course she knows he lies.
“I know about her,” she says.
He looks at her and there is no surprise in his eyes,
He offers no ostentatious words of denial.
Unperturbed by his betrayal
 “Don’t wait up for me,” he says.
His words cut her like a knife
Her heart is bleeding
She feels like screaming
But she is numbed by his indifference
An apology, or even a denial,
Anything would have been better
than his cold indifference.

Solitude

As oft we moan and groan about our broken hearts,
Of the love we had and lost, of the one who was insincere,
And whose promises and words of love were false.

Yet there are those who have never loved,
Who have never known what it is like to have
a broken heart,
Some whose lips have never been kissed,
Who have never had arms to hold them tight,
Who have never felt the touch of a gentle caress,
Or experience the ecstasy of another body next to theirs,
The womb that never bore a child,
The breast that never suckled,
What is it like to go through life without once being touched?

Some wait and wait to find the perfect someone,
That never ever comes along,
Wasted years, waiting for something that doesn’t exist,
Some wait for that perfect husband,
To give them that perfect child,
A glimpse of him eventually appears,
But alas! It is too late because the childbearing days are gone,
So there still remains that uneven equation,
And the feeling that something is missing.

We live in an imperfect world and there is no such thing,
As a perfect someone,
For those who have never loved,
There is no missing something you have never experienced,
And though it may seem safer,
Is it really happier not to love,
Than to love and have your heart broken?
Not necessarily, because there will be no good times
to remember,
No memories to cherish, no one to reminisce about,
No experience to guide you,
What is it like to have lived and never loved?

Relationships

 

Is it possible to stop loving someone you once truly loved?

The topic I am writing on today is up for debate and I am sure many of my readers views might be different from mine.   Some people believe that if you love someone you will continue to love that person no matter what and if you stop loving that person it means that you never truly loved them in the first place. The problem I have with this scenario is that it seems a bit one-sided.  The first question that comes to mind is what if that person you love don’t love you as much as you love him or her.  Even then that is not the real issue; what if the one you that love is constantly abusing you, physically and emotionally?  Isn’t there a possibility that at some point in time you might stop loving that person?  Some people will contend that you should still love the person but not the behavior but seriously how are you going to separate the two?

Love is an emotion and emotions do not necessarily remain constant except in a fairy tale world.  People and situations change and while in some cases couples are able to remain in love for a life time in a lot of other cases relationships just fail to work out.  That does not necessarily mean they did not love each other initially.  As we grow older we evolve and our needs change and if both parties are not in touch with each other needs the relationship can disintegrate.  There are times when dreams, hopes and expectations do not materialize and couples become disillusioned and bitter and blame each other, this  can destroy a relationship.

There is a high rate of divorce and many relationships fall apart over time but this does not mean that people might not have felt what they thought was true love for each other at some point in the relationship.  If a relationship doesn’t work out does that mean that both parties never truly loved each other?  What do you think?

 

Relationships

 

 

Having a relationship and making it work is sometimes a very difficult job. Often times relationships fail because partners do not work hard enough to make the relationship work. Many people have the misconception that when you meet someone and fall in love you have reached that milestone and when you say the vows and the ring goes on, it is as if that coveted prize has been won. However do not be fooled because it is then when the real work begins, the job of making sure that the relationship works out. If both parties are committed despite the odds it can work out.

Relationships can become complicated for many reasons. In many relationships after a while partners begin to take each other for granted. Some become less expressive and ‘I love you or I care for you’ is heard a lot less. It doesn’t mean that they love their partner any less, it just seem like it is no longer important to let their partner know how they feel. They take it for granted that the other person should know. Telling your partner that you love him or her every once in a while will help to reassure that person that you care about him or her.

Do not make important decisions without consulting your partner first. Be supportive and encourage each other. Do not ridicule or be unduly critical of each other. Never say hurtful words to each other because once you say those words even when you regret saying them the truth is you can’t take them back. Even if you later apologize it does not mean that your partner will not still feel hurt by what you said. Remember the things you say during an argument can be a reflection of what you are really feeling inside, so be careful what you say.

At all times treat each other with respect. Be honest with each other and being honest also means being faithful to each other. If you no longer love the person and wants to end the relationship be upfront and honest and let your partner know. It might be painful but it is better to let them know rather to go seeing someone else behind their back. That will be even more painful when they find out. Think before you act. Remember it is not a good thing to mess with someone heart.

 

Relationships


Some people rely heavily on others for their happiness.  They invest a lot into their relationships and sometimes put themselves in a position where they become vulnerable.  Some people entire life revolve around their partners, they make them the center of their universe; they love them more than life itself.  This is a rather unhealthy and sometimes dangerous situation for when a relationship goes sour, these are the people who have difficulty coping.  Some even contemplate suicide at the prospect of having to live without their partner if a relationship ends.

It is good and healthy to love someone, however it is very important for you to love yourself also.  Never rely on someone else to see to your happiness because you may be setting yourself up for disappointment.  Don’t allow yourself to get so wrapped up in someone else that life becomes meaningless without them.  Don’t ever contemplate taking your life because the man or woman you are with decides they don’t want to be with you anymore, because the only loser will be you.  When you end your life they will continue to live theirs.  Their life is not going to end just because you are no longer around!

Broken relationships can result in a lot of heartache and pain but it wont last forever.  When one door closes another one opens.  Keep a positive mind and who knows someone better will come along.  Life is precious so try and live it to the fullest.

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For the Love of Money

She plays the dutiful wife,
she pretends that everything is all right,
But alone in her bed at night,
she wonders who she is fooling.
He doesn’t love her,
He doesn’t really care.
The big house, the expensive car,
the money in the bank,
Does nothing to ease her loneliness,
or to make up for the fact,
She has lost him to someone else
and she cannot win him back.

She cries herself to sleep at night,
And wonder what she is doing wrong,
why she lies alone each night,
while another woman has her man.
Sometime she wants to leave him,
but it is really hard to do,
She has become too accustomed to living,
this life of luxury.
It would be easy to leave him,
but not the money, the big house or the car,
So she suffers silently
and tells herself,
You just can’t have it all!

Marva Seaton

Scars

I see the scars etched upon your face,
I tried to catch your eyes,
but you quickly looked away.
“It was an accident,” you say,
but we both know the truth.
“I  love him,” you say,
The question is, does he love you too?
Don’t you know girl,
that love is not supposed to hurt?
It’s not supposed to leave you
with scars etched upon your face.
I think if I look deep enough I’ll see,
the scars etched upon your heart.

Marva Seaton

Solitude

As oft we moan and groan about our broken hearts,
Of the love we had and lost, of the one who was insincere,
And whose promises and words of love were false.

Yet there are those who have never loved,
Who have never known what it is like to have
a broken heart,
Some whose lips have never been kissed,
Who have never had arms to hold them tight,
Who have never felt the touch of a gentle caress,
Or experience the ecstasy of another body next to theirs,
The womb that never bore a child,
The breast that never suckled,
What is it like to go through life without once being touched?

Some wait and wait to find the perfect someone,
That never ever comes along,
Wasted years, waiting for something that doesn’t exist,
Some wait for that perfect husband,
To give them that perfect child,
A glimpse of him eventually appears,
But alas! It is too late because the childbearing days are gone,
So there still remains that uneven equation,
And the feeling that something is missing.

We live in an imperfect world and there is no such thing,
As a perfect someone,
For those who have never loved,
There is no missing something you have never experienced,
And though it may seem safer,
Is it really happier not to love,
Than to love and have your heart broken?
Not necessarily, because there will be no good times
to remember,
No memories to cherish, no one to reminisce about,
No experience to guide you,
What is it like to have lived and never loved?

 

Sometimes we spend so much time moaning over the things that are wrong in our lives that we do not take the time to notice all the wonderful things we have that are often  times more important than the things we complain about.  Every morning we wake we need to give thanks to God for allowing us to live to see another day.   Give thanks for the things we have that we take so much for granted; like being able to see, or talk, or walk, always be mindful that there are some out there who can’t.   Give thanks for good health, for family and friends.  Give thanks for the problems and obstacles you were able to overcome.  These life lessons help to make us stronger.  These experiences can make us wiser.  At all times as long as there is life, give thanks!

Enslaved

I look at her battered, bruised face
And she quickly looks away,
‘I fell,’ she responded,
to the unspoken question,
And yet she wouldn’t look my way.
Caught up in a situation of physical abuse,
why did she think she had to stay?
‘Leave him,’ I told her,
And she pretended not to understand.
‘I fell,’ she repeated,
trying to convince me,
trying to convince herself.
‘You don’t deserve this,’
I told her.
‘He loves me,’ she says.
‘No,’ I tell her.
‘Love is not supposed to hurt.’
She nods her head as if she,
agrees with me,
And yet I wonder,
Does she really understand?

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