Category: Women

Empowering Women

7 REASONS NOT TO RETURN AN ABUSIVE RELATIONSHIP

  1. Remember that it was the abusive behavior of your partner which caused you to leave in the first place. You were not happy in the relationship.
  2. He will continue to abuse you even if he promises you that he will never hit you again.
  3. Abusers seldom stop their abusive behavior unless they get some form of counseling or therapy so don’t go back and expect him to change simply because he says he has changed. As soon as he gets comfortable with you being back he will start abusing you again.
  4. Abusers like to instill fear in their victims so he will try to make you so fearful of him that you are less likely to leave him.
  5. He may become more possessive and controlling and try to make you more isolated from your family and friends. He might start keeping tabs on you, watching you more closely for any sign that you might try to leave again.
  6. He may do everything within his power to make it impossible for you to leave again. He might even threaten to take your life.
  7. The most serious of all the reasons is that he may follow through on his threats. You may never get the chance to escape a second time with your life. Some abusers are prepared to take your life and then theirs.

Once you get the chance to leave the relationship never return to an abusive partner no matter how persuasive he may be.

Empowering Women

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Empowering Women

Relationships

Some Abusers are like Chameleons

You cannot just look at a man and tell that he is an abuser. Sometimes they are the most unsuspecting people you will ever meet. It could be that man who is always cordial and greets you with a smile. It can be that deacon who prays the loudest and the longest in church on Sundays. It can be that man who always seems helpful. Most abusers like to be liked and they can be quite charming. It is this charm that often draws women in.

In public he may treat his woman like a queen because he wants people to have a good impression of him. It is behind closed doors that the monster in him rears its ugly head and he becomes a different person. There is  no one for him to impress and he becomes her worst nightmare. He often sets the stage so that people might not even believe her if she tells them what he is truly like. It is easy to get in his grasp but hard to get out because he likes control and he thinks he is clever. The woman has no choice but to seek people who she can trust and plan her escape.

Empowering Women

Relationships

Does he try to control you?

One of the most important thing in a relationship is for a woman to never lose her individuality or her independence. She should be able to make important decisions for herself and not allow her partner to make those decisions for her.

Once you see that your partner is trying to control who you see, where you go and what you do there is cause for alarm. This is not normal behavior and you should never accept it because before you know it he will take full control of your life. Talk to him about it and tell him how you feel. If he reacts with aggression and insists on controlling you then you need to rethink the relationship.

Empowering Women

Keep the Conversation Going

An Open Letter to Men
From Women Against Domestic Violence
Dear Men:
It is with tears in our eyes and fear for our lives that we pen this note to you. Domestic violence has taken the lives of many of our sisters leaving many of our homes broken and our children motherless. Men we need you to understand that we are not the enemy so stop treating us like one. We give to you our love, our passion, our understanding and compassion, we trust you with our lives and all we ask is that you reciprocate and treat us right. Don’t see our love for you as a weakness, don’t leave us with cuts and bruises, don’t crush out our joy and leave us broken. You see men you need to understand that love is not supposed to hurt. If your love is causing your woman hurt then it means that you are doing something wrong. Any boy can hurt a woman but it takes a man to make her happy. So the next time you raise your hand to hit a woman stop and ask yourself am I a boy or am I a man. Treat women with love and respect….Be A Man!

Empowering Women

We must empower girls and choose carefully the words we say to them. Stop telling little girls that they are sexy. Stop planting that seed in their minds that the greatest attribute of a woman is to be sexy. Tell them that they are beautiful, intelligent, royal, strong, graceful, elegant and most of all important. Tell them that they are worthy of being loved, respected and peotected. Tell them that their self worth and high self-esteem is important. Tell them that they are more precious than diamond and gold, tell them that they are priceless.

Empowering Women

Relationships

Never Get Involved With a Married Man

You would think that the fact that he is married would be a deterrent but despite this a lot of women get involved with married men and hang on to the hope that one day he will leave his wife.

Many women fall victims to the lie told to them by these men. Often times a man will make his wife out to be the problem in the relationship and offer the other woman hope that he will get a divorce. Some women are foolish enough to spend years waiting for him to be free, not grasping the fact that he has no intention of leaving home. Even if he does leave home what guarantee do you have that he wont do to you what he did to her. If he is married he is off limit so leave him alone.

Empowering Women

Does He Have Multiple Baby Mothers

Ladies this is the year that we have to get real about relationships and ensure that we take the right path and make the right decisions.

A man with multiple baby mothers is probably a mover. Often times he is afraid of the responsibility of fatherhood so he keeps moving on once a child gets in the picture. A man like that rarely makes commitments to any woman and often times he is never there for his children.

This is clearly the type of man who you should stay away from. If you are unfortunate enough to fall under his spell make sure you don’t end up being another of his baby mama, unless of course you are prepared to raise your child alone. Don’t fool yourself into believing that you can change him because these kind of men often live this lifestyle until life bites them in the ass. Don’t waste your time with someone like this.

Empowering Women

Relationships

Are you Facing Emotional Abuse?

We have all heard the saying “Sticks and stones can break my bones but words can never hurt me.” But let’s face it we all know this is not true. There is  nothing more hurtful than to have someone who you love put you down with his words, insults you and say hurtful words that makes you feel worthless.

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Many women suffer emotional abuse from their partners. A man will say hurtful things to a woman, which can literally tear her apart, break her down and make her feel as if she is not worthy of his love. Often he erodes her self-esteem and little by little she begins to think less of herself.

One thing ever woman must understand is that love is not supposed to hurt. If he hurts you emotionally then his kind of love is  not right for you. Be true to yourself and walk away because you deserve better.

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Empowering Women

Relationships

Does he Show Sign of Abusiveness

One of the many dangers faced by women is domestic violence in relationships. In my home country of Jamaica a total of ten women have been murdered by their partners in a little over two weeks. This is alarming.

Domestic violence is one of the most difficult crime to contain because in many cases you don’t know beforehand that it is going to happen. The onus therefore lies on the woman to take preventative measures to protect her life.

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If the man you are considering having a relationship shows signs of abusiveness or is known to have been abusive in a previous relationship stay clear of him. If he hurt you physically, even if it is one time do not give him the opportunity to put his hands on you again. Do not believe him if he tells you it will never happen again because in most cases it will.  The longer you remain in an abusive relationship the more power you give to the man and the more difficult it will be for you to end the relationship.

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