Some Abusers are like Chameleons
You cannot just look at a man and tell that he is an abuser. Sometimes they are the most unsuspecting people you will ever meet. It could be that man who is always cordial and greets you with a smile. It can be that deacon who prays the loudest and the longest in church on Sundays. It can be that man who always seems helpful. Most abusers like to be liked and they can be quite charming. It is this charm that often draws women in.
In public he may treat his woman like a queen because he wants people to have a good impression of him. It is behind closed doors that the monster in him rears its ugly head and he becomes a different person. There is no one for him to impress and he becomes her worst nightmare. He often sets the stage so that people might not even believe her if she tells them what he is truly like. It is easy to get in his grasp but hard to get out because he likes control and he thinks he is clever. The woman has no choice but to seek people who she can trust and plan her escape.